Why poor spelling? Because I'm simply too lazy right now to even hit the spell button ... though who knows what can happen by the end of this. So I check my blog subs everyday from work (productive still while I am there) and I keep thinking I really oughtah post something because I love to write. I don't know why I wait for so long ... maybe it's the build up and dump ... and really I'm only doing this for myself. Like ... I read blogs of other people because I am genuinly interested in what's going on ... I watch to see how their children are fairing ... I have a great big fat heart and for some odd reason there's a HUGE place in that heart for children with cancer and mito disease and seizures and other random strange rare afflictions. I'm not sure why, I wasn't a sick child, I don't recall knowing any ... I don't know ... I'm drawn to them ...
ALSO drawn to the strength of the parents ... oh man ... could you IMAGINE! I can't even begin to realize what it must be like to be the parent of a very sick child. I mean ... my girls have been your average run of the mill sick in the past, R has had tubes placed, M has had a couple of fevers over 104 and vomiting ... we've done breathing treatments and there's been the emotional interventions ... but for real ... what these parents go through with their children ... I'm in awe of their abilities ... their ability to be honest and caring and flawed and daring and so raw and so real ... it's amazing the things can be when they are placed in certain situations. I don't even know these people and I love them AND their children and their families and their support system. A woman, I follow her blog ... her husband just passed recently after a valiant battle with brain cancer ... she's a mother of two young children, she's a loving wife, a loving mother, from what I can tell a loving friend and daughter. She was always so gratefull for everytihng ... only very rarely did she complain about her situation, really the only time she would speak negatively was when addressing the fact that the girls would not have their father in their lives. A gracious woman ... I would be honnored to know this woman. I had shared her blog with a friend of mine. My friend had read the blog cover to cover ... and after reading she said that she was jealous of their love ... she would give anything to swap places with her because what this wife ... soon to be widow ... what she had was true love ... and it was beautiful ...
Now I ramble ... it's beauty in pain. It seems often that people who do not suffer, people who do not meet obsticles, they don't know how to really value life. It makes sense though right ... you don't know just HOW bored you could really be until your life is no longer exciting ... You have no idea how loved you were until your lover is dying ... how graced you are with children (as pains in the butts they can be) until they are sick. How fabulous the air in your lungs is ... until those lungs are empty ... unable to expand.
